Before the Europeans had fully come to grips with that whole Earth-is-not-flat thing and there wasn’t much east of Jerusalem or south of Alexandria, Australia was no more than a concept. It even had its own groovy Latin name: Terra Australis (meaning “Vaguely terrifying”). Once they understood that Earth is…
I met Dave Graney in South Melbourne, between rehearsal and gig; he is as always immaculately, exquisitely and uniquely attired. We take a stroll down Clarendon Street looking for somewhere quiet to grab some calories and Do This Thing. As we walk we’re chatting about the inner suburbs, architecture, the…
As an undergrad student at the University of Queensland I wasted weeks, possibly months of each year in the library, browsing magazines. OK. Maybe I didn’t actually waste that time, seeing as how I went on to work in magazines a few years later. Let’s just say I ‘invested’ a…
As an atheist, one of the most common questions I get asked – apart from “would you please leave?” – is “Why are you an atheist?” And it is a fair question: for the average person, it’s pretty hard to understand why a man would turn his back on tradition,…
Some days I wake up bleary-eyed, with the idea that the nation has begun a headlong slide backwards into the hungry, toothy maw of a new Dark Age. I would not raise an eyebrow were I to switch on to ABC News 24 to find that legislation has been introduced…
Dear Atheists, what are you so worried about? One of the most amusing things in the lead up to this year’s census was the almost paranoid vigour with which some atheists encouraged other non-believers to make sure that they ticked the right box on their form, “Don’t write Jedi, you…
Where I live, where I choose to live, where thankfully my presence is tolerated, would be described, if this was America, as ‘backwoods’. There are five commas in that opening sentence, and that’s the sentence I’ve really thought about. So we are possibly not in snappy, easy to read magazine…
You’re eight or nine years old, slight and small of stature, asthmatic and allergic to a whole raft of things. Shy. You have a friend, your best friend, a bullet-headed, nuggetty little scrapper named Fitz. They leave you alone when he’s around, but when he’s not, you’re a red rag.…
On July 29 this year, Tony Abbott declared on Nine’s Today show that carbon dioxide was “an invisible, odourless, weightless, tasteless substance,” making its industrial emissions too hard to measure. Anyone with a Year 10 chemistry textbook could have proved him wrong. But if we were expecting a response to…
And then suddenly the shaking stops and there isn’t a goat next door. For most people, this won’t appear to be a problem. Not having a goat next door has become, in this modern world of iPads, Twitter and ironic moustaches, the expected state of affairs. In fact, very rarely…
So, you’ve just read a thoughtful and erudite piece of online political commentary. Enlivened by new ideas, you’re keen to continue the conversation, share your thoughts, and maybe even re-evaluate a few of your positions. Your cat has never shown a particular interest in the impact of the carbon tax…
The main thing people tell you ahead of your first visit to the United States is that it’s expensive. “You’ll leave America broke,” they say, nodding sagely, “a loaf of bread is, like, $8.” Who knows when the collective travel unconscious picked up this particular factoid - maybe in an…
We all know the salutary tale about the boy who cried wolf: his repeated but baseless entreaties became so familiar to the townsfolk that they ultimately ignored his cries for help when he actually needed it. The fable’s lesson is a simple one — if you make a habit of…
I hate this dance we do. It starts with something small. Something barely noticeable. Sometimes it even masks itself as something positive. Like maybe you suddenly decided to clean the house from top to bottom. To the untrained eye that’s a good thing. But this isn’t my first rodeo and…
Malcolm Turnbull had his shot at leadership of the Liberal Party and bollocksed it up royally, but no-one would believe for a second that means he’s given up on the idea — and nor should he. In Canberra’s political firmament he’s the only star on either side with the combination…
It is fashionable to the point of cliche to intone wisely that the political terms ‘left’ and ‘right’ no longer have any meaning. Let’s call this the Disappearing Left/Right Hypothesis - DLRH. Supporting argument for DLRH goes something like this: in western democracies, which tend to have a two-party system,…
Remember Punch and Judy? Those wacky, zany puppets who smack each other (and anyone else who comes near) around with big sticks? Well there’s a new puppet show in town, with a host of little Punches and Judys lining up to take a whack. The target of their attention? Poker…
There’s a host of great articles about Fred Nile swanning around the internet at the moment. Many of these are witty, erudite, informative and relevant. I felt like I needed to contribute some kind of honking, goose-like piece to balance the spectrum. THE STARS: In these confusing times, it’s often…
…So succinctly said the late André Tchelistcheff, the pint-sized (all 150 centimetres of him) dean of American winemakers, and those words, to many winemakers, still ring true today. Other grape varieties have bad raps (Viognier translated from Latin means ‘road to hell’) but Pinot Noir is the proverbial Holy Grail…

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