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Selecting, raising and training
I raised one kid safely and sanely to adulthood and I, she and our greater social surrounds are generally happy with the result. I've also raised quite a number of dogs - also safely and sanely to adult dog-hood. So has my kid.

We love our dogs, but however much we love our dogs - and spoil them, and allow them to infest our homes, and put up with certain individual behavioural eccentricities - there is always the understanding, on both sides, that when push comes to shove, THEY are dogs, and WE are the boss.

I reckon that's not so different from raising kids really. I think both should be loved but not unduly indulged, taught the extent of socially acceptable boundaries and behaviour, rewarded for good behaviour and shown the consequences of bad, and given the freedom to run around and follow their natural inclinations, but know to “come back when called”.

Just as with raising kids, there's a whole world of mythologies out there about raising dogs. I've found that almost all of these myths and problems about dog-raising (and to a large extent kid-raising!) are debunkable or at least manageable by a few very simple rules:

1. You are ALWAYS top dog (or parent, depending on the species involved).

2. The extension of the above is that every human your dog ever meets regardless of age, gender, obnoxiousness, height, or any other measurable, is higher up the social order than your dog (this is obviously more specific to dogs than kids but the shared general principle is respect!)

3. Be consistent with rewards and punishment (and yes, appropriate physical discipline is OK).

4. And finally, there are far too many badly disciplined small fluffy white dogs in the world.

This last point is of course an analogy - I don't have anything in particular against small fluffy white dogs (well, almost nothing anyway!) - but they are symbolic of the hordes of barking, snapping, unpleasant, diabolical animals that terrorise large numbers of human homes [insert your preferred image of the corresponding child archetype here].

An illustrative story …

I remember visiting a friend's house with a group of people one evening, and being not quick enough on the uptake, was left standing while the resident canine - Miffy, Muffy, Fluffy, whatever - growled menacingly from the centre of the only available lounge chair. As I looked meaningfully at Mein Host, I was told with complete seriousness that the little precious (by now curling its lips in a full-fledged snarl) didn't like anyone sitting on 'his' chair. I don't think I endeared myself very much as I leaned down and swept the offending hairball to the floor before firmly claiming my territory. Miffy, Muffy, Fluffy, whatever - spent the rest of the evening on the floor near my (thankfully sensibly shod) foot, growling menacingly, and was completely ignored by his 'master' for this blatant breach of protocol! Why do people allow this?!!!

So…. now, flagrantly abandoning the topic of kids and on to one of my favourite soap boxes - 'Selecting the appropriate dog: Breed characteristics do matter!' … or dogs I love, dogs I hate and why (in no particular order).

English Staffordshire Bull Terriers
Despite their resemblance to hairy alligators or the Hungry-Hungry Hippo, staffies are surprisingly sensitive, exceedingly trustworthy around children, and one of the best family dogs available … with a few caveats …

They are very physical and are almost irrepressible rush and jump greeters, which can flatten small children and make it look like your staffy is mauling young Justinia/Rancelot when, in fact, the child is just being welcomed and given a tongue bath.

Whilst friendly towards people, they are not automatically going to like other animals - they were, after all, created by nasty humans specifically for fighting bulls and other dogs - so DO NOT let your yapping fluffy snack-on-a-lead rush up to some poor unsuspecting staffy or you might get to see artificial selection in action, messily so, and best not witnessed by the kiddies! This is not to say they can't be taught to cohabitate with other pets, they can, but they should be supervised and your 'I am pack leader and say to thee “nae, thou shalt not eat the cat” skills' should be kept handy.

It's very hard to hurt a staffy as they have thick skin, fewer nerve endings than most dogs and a weird 'suck it up' attitude to pain, so a limp-wristed smack will not even be noticed when physical correction is called for …But just you try yelling at a staffy, and your 20kg ball of muscle will shrink to the ground in abject misery at your displeasure - disapproval goes a long way with a these dogs!!

Beagles
Beagles are quite sweet, but the problem with them is that some ridiculous figure - like 94.6% or something - of their brain is directly wired to their nose. The result is they are insanely hard to train as they just can't FOCUS! And you can virtually never let them off a lead as once that nose hits the dirt, the other 4% of their brain wired to the running-away-following-the-scent muscles kicks in (the remaining 1.4% brain power supports vital organs), so they become deaf and blind to all attempts at recapture and are sure to miss seeing the 630 bus bearing down on them as they shoot across New Street from the park.

Labradors and hairy retrievery things
Only a simple list of euphemisms is needed to describe these schizophrenic dogs:

Boisterous - will jump all over you.

Friendly - will jump all over you and everyone else.

Athletic - will jump all over you, and everyone else then run away quickly before you can clip on the lead.

Bold - will believe it is his/her RIGHT to jump all over you, and everyone else then run away quickly before you can clip on the lead, and in fact do anything he/she wants, whenever he/she wants, with no regard for anyone, because he/she is the top dog.

To be fair, most of the above problems lie with people who do not bother to understand the intrinsically strong-minded nature of labs and retrievers, and indulge these dogs while they are sweet and cute and little, and end up creating dominant, destructive, devious monsters as a result!

Greyhounds
Adopt a Greyhound. Adopt one today, in fact right now, if you've reached the "OK we're getting a dog'" stage, do yourself (and the world!) a favour and go and sign up with the Greyhounds as Pets people at Racing Victoria and await your hopeful approval as a Greyhound-suitable parent (yes, they approve YOU, not the other way around!).

These dogs have been raised in the kennels of Pharaohs and the complete captivity of racing stables for around 3000 years, so they do not need much exercise, a yard or all your undivided attention. They are sweet, noble, quiet, clean, tolerant couch potatoes who need little more than warmth, the occasional stroke of your hand and a bit of a trot on a lead. Despite their size, this means they can be perfectly content in a flat or apartment. They love to run of course, but can only do so in an enclosed area, one without any small furry things running in front of them. They can appear aloof, but they have a wacky sense of humour once you get to know them - adopt a Greyhound and you'll never look back.

A note on Whippets: These smaller versions of the Greyhound (created by crossing with terriers generations ago) share many of the same characteristics, but are usually more nervous and can be suspicious of strangers, and, if not confined, are dreadful wanderers.

Chihuahuas
Love 'em. Own 'em. Completely biased. But they're not for everyone. However, if you can get past the 'little rat' mythology, you'll be surprised, captivated and entertained (and just possibly more obsessive about them than is healthy)!

Terriers
Jack Russell, Silky, Australian, Cairn, Scottish, West Highland White, etc etc etc …in a word - don't bother, or if you must, TRAIN THEM!

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